My Favourite Examples
I'd share a few puns of my own but they're either too personal (i.e. not many would get it) or in another language, so please enjoy the following more general puns instead.
- Archeologist: A man whose career lies in ruins.
- Egotist: One who is me-deep in conversation.
- Hangover: The wrath of grapes.
- Middle Age: When actions creak louder than words.
- Psychologist: A person that pulls habits out of rats.
- I used to be a ballet dancer, but found it too-too difficult.
- I used to be a butler, but found the work wasn't my cup of tea.
- I used to be a carpenter, but then I got bored.
- I used to be a part-time hairdresser, but I wanted something more permanent.
- I used to be a lumberjack, but then I got the axe.
- I used to be a tennis instructor, but it just wasn't my racket.
- I used to be a transplant surgeon, but my heart just wasn't in it.
- I used to work for Victoria's Secret, but then I got a pink slip.
- At a radiator shop (A-1 Radiator) "Best Place in Town to take a Leak"
- Sign over a gynecologist's office "Dr. Jones, at your cervix."
- On the trucks of a local plumbing company in NE Pennsylvania: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."
- Pizza shop slogan: "7 days without pizza makes one weak."
- At a tire shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blowout"
- On an electrician's truck "Let us remove your shorts."
- On a maternity room door: "Push. Push. Push."
- At an optometrist's office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."
- In a podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels."
- At a car dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet -- miss a car payment."
- In a veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"
- At the electric company: "We would be de-lighted if you send in your bill. However, if you don't, you will be."